Hello? Apple? I am trying to give you money.

by Suw on May 18, 2005

Apple suck. Macs are great, but Apple suck arse. They suck so hard they blow.
Had I known that it would take 20 days to get my new iBook after ordering from their online store, I would have walked to London and got it there. It would have been faster. Hell, for £2 I could have got a National Express 'Funfare' and made it there and back in a day.
I ordered my iBook on 6 May, and the online store implied that delivery would be on the 11th. In fact, the date I took to be the delivery date was actually the 'build by' date – there was no delivery date to be found. Then I got an email saying that the build would be delayed by a week. Checking the order status religiously I saw that the order had been shipped on the 12th. No delivery date though, just a link to the TNT tracker which produced precisely no information on expected delivery at all.
By this point, there is no cancelling and no going back. Trip to London is out of the question, unless I want to spend a lot more money and end up with two iBooks.
This morning I got so annoyed with waiting, and with the online consignment 'tracker' that doesn't work, that I rang TNT. They told me that they had no record of my shipment. So I rang Apple. They didn't tell me anything at all – they put me on hold, let me wait, and wait, and wait, and then the fuckers cut me off. Twice. Tried a different number, finally got through to the grumpiest customer service rep I have ever spoken to, who told me that I won't be getting my iBook until the Twenty Fifth Day of this Venerable Month of May.
Apparently, iBooks are made in Asia. Apparently, they take fucking forever to get from Asia to the Netherlands, where they will join up with the rest of my stuff (iWork and an Airport Express), before meandering their way, probably via Rio, to my house in Dorset.
If Apple had given me any sort of an honest delivery date I would have gone to London to the Apple Store and bought it there – they still would have got my money, and I would have got my iBook faster. I could have. I was in London last weekend. Would have been so easy. But no. They insinuate with their 'build by' date that the process is going to be quick, easy and painless.
I love Macs, I really do. Such a better working environment than PCs, with software that really does what it says it's going to do. It saddens me, as a Macolyte, that Apple can't get their shit together on basic things like giving me the gear I bought. It pisses me off that they can't have a well-manned helpline with a staff of cheery people who can at least fucking apologise for messing you about. (It also pisses me off that they sue bloggers, but that's another post.)
And you know what… I am wondering if it's actually legal for Apple to take your money without giving you a delivery date before you confirm your order. Hm, maybe I need to look into that. I love Macs, but right now I'd more love to stick a pin in their collective eye and see how they like it.

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 10:55 am

Hiya Suw.
I sympathise…I had a similar kinda experience:
Just so you know you're not alone !

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 4:07 pm

My dear, if you really are a “writer, journalist, and professional blogger”, then modern literary standards have become woefully lax. While you're waiting so impatiently for the delivery man, why not spend a few minutes proofreading your work or practicing complete sentence construction? And even though I can understand your strong desire to get your new iBook (Macs really are worth the wait), perhaps you might want to consider if the lack of diplomacy in your writing might have also been a part of your telephone manners.
Anyway, as you might say, good fucking luck getting your shit from those fuckers…

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 4:21 pm

Oh darling, who yanked your chain? If you don't like my blog, you are free to leave at any time. This is my personal space, sweetie, and I'll write here in any style I wish, complete with profanity, colloquial grammar and incomplete. Fucking. Sentences.

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 5:30 pm

You go, girl. And let's hope Anonymous has a long bitter life running around to different blogs and whining.
–(still your fanboy) ACW

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 5:50 pm

That's hot. Wanna shag?

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 5:56 pm

You know, I live quite close to their factory. If you'd asked, I could have gone there to pick it up for you…. Got to take my own Powerbook there soon to see if they can do something about the red line on my screen….

Anonymous May 18, 2005 at 6:46 pm

(I feel your pain, Suw.)

Anonymous May 19, 2005 at 1:09 pm

everytime i've ordered from apple, from a single ipod to an entire studio's worth of G5 towers they've sucked the big one. their customer service sucks. very quick to take the cash. then really slow to deliver. macs atre great – i agree 110% – but go to the store, or buy off a third party like macwarehouse – because the apple store is the worst. Hball.

Anonymous May 19, 2005 at 1:14 pm

Oh yes, I have learnt my lesson. I will never order from the Apple store again. Ever.

Anonymous May 21, 2005 at 12:55 am

I hope that you get your iBook soon. Just got one myself, and don't know how I've lived without it. After bad experiences with Apple in the past I got it from John Lewis. Have fun when eventually it arrives.

Anonymous May 22, 2005 at 3:47 am

Boy do I hate to spoil the party.
When I bought my iBook, I spoke on the phone to two of the nicest reps ever, and my iBook arrived within a quite reasonable amount of time. I don't remember exactly, but it was probably around ten days or so.
Good luck, I guess.

Anonymous May 22, 2005 at 9:14 am

I wonder if that's cos you're in the States and we're not? Maybe it's just European Apple that sucks.
Anyway, I am hoping to get it soon. 🙂

Anonymous June 7, 2005 at 12:37 am

Nah, I'm in the states and it took way too damn long to get my 2 iPods. If it weren't for the free engraving, I would have bought them at a local store. Instead, we waited about 6 weeks to get them. They were fine when they got here, though.

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