Just don't add it up

by Suw on September 22, 2003

I’ve just spent the afternoon figuring out which business invoices I can and can’t pay, and how much I can pay off the ones that I can’t pay all of. Although paying some creditors completely has made me feel a little better – particularly when those were freelancers rather than companies – all in all it’s a pretty depressing thing to do because it’s not my money I’m paying them with.

A little financial wangling has resulted in a situation where I can pay just over half what the business still owes, but in the long run this is just adding to my own personal debt mountain as the business is pulling in approximately ?13.50 a month right now.

I don’t like to add up what I owe, but suffice to say that it’s over mid five figures and enough to have bought a small house somewhere like north Wales. I try not to think about it, but days like today I have to sit down and smile with gritted teeth whilst I try to, at the very least, tidy things up a bit.

Using the Ostrich Method of Coping may not be wise, but it’s the only method that works at the moment. Anything to stop the fear setting in, because if that happens again I’ll be huddled in a corner and unable to answer the phone anymore.

Still, I’m going to go away now and think some resolutely positive thoughts.

*nods sagely*

And possibly some reprehensible ones too…

*grins wickedly*

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