IOC gets head stuck irreversibly up arse

by Suw on May 26, 2003

It seems that the International Olympic Committee has finally lost its collective head somewhere in its collective lower intestine, and has decided to ban wild card entries into the Olympics. This means no more Eddie the Eagle, soaring gracelessly through our skies as we all hold our breath, hoping ferverently that he doesn't break anything when he lands. No more Eric “the Eel” Moussambani, struggling not only to complete the 100m swim, but also to keep himself from drowning.

This is a sad day for the Olympics – most of us will never be an Olympic athlete, or even an athlete of any sort. Unless sitting at a computer for 18 hours a day suddenly becomes an Olympic sport, in which case I may be in with a chance. But people like Eddie and Eric, somewhat patronisingly called 'characters', were our representatives there. We'll never know what it's like to compete on that kind of stage, but they did, and they did it for us. They had guts, they had nerves of steel, they didn't mind making prats out of themselves for our entertainment, and their triumphs (of not breaking their spines or drowning) were far greater than that of winning a gold medal, because they started the competition knowing that they could never, ever win, yet they competed anyway. That, as far as I'm concerned, is true Olympic spirit.

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